Finally back online!!!!

Haven't been able to update for a few days as I broke my modem. It stopped working the other day, so I spoke with my friend Jerry who suggested it may need re-flowing, or something like that. Anyway, he said to put it in the microwave for a minute and it would sort it out, he also claimed this would give me a hundred meg connection!!

I cautiously put it in the microwave, I set it for 55 seconds just to be on the safe side. It started sparking and crackling and then some sort of ectoplasm formed and I think I saw the ghost of Kiefer Sutherland from when he dies in that film called Flat liners.

I let it continue for the full 55 seconds, Kiefer looked a bit narked but I had a blog to update, so it was tough titties Kiefer! The microwave finally pinged and I removed the modem,it was boiling hot so I put it the freezer for a bit to cool off. When I finally plugged it back in it didn't work! I rang Jerry and he just laughed and said "I was joking you idiot". Me and Jerry don't talk anymore.

After all that debacle I went to the local PC store and told them my predicament, they could see I was quite tech savvy because I told them I have a blog to update. They suggested i buy the Netgear DGNB2100 N300 Modem Router which cost £119.99. They said this would really take advantage of my 1meg broadband. I also told them what had happened to my old modem and they said i most probably blew my old motherboard when I reconnected it, so suggested I buy the Sony L11S1E/S - All-in-one PC with 25" touchscreen monitor which cost me £1,399.99. They said that using the Internet and blogging was really intensive on the processor and this computer would make it a breeze!

After acquiring my bargains I got home and set them all up. They really are brilliant! My Internet has never been smoother, and this blog update was a pleasure. The main downside is that I injured my right index finger 2 years ago when I was shot by a laser beam from an alien spacecraft. It left it quite withered so using the touchscreen isn't all that easy for me.

I would just like to say that anybody looking to upgrade their PC equipment, don't be afraid to let them know how much knowledge you have. Don't feel intimidated, you probably know more than them! You could end up with the bargains I have.

I also emailed the ONESHOW to tell them about this, and enquired about maybe filling in for Dom Littlewood(he's the small bald guy who gives consumer advise) when he can't be on, so I will probably be on the T.V in the new year!